Results for 'paul eastwick'

1. Paul , Eastwick

Bonded by Evolution

A groundbreaking look at the science of attachment and compatibility, challenging our most fundamental assumptions about love and attraction and revealing the real keys to lasting connection and deeper relationships.“Riveting insights . . . on the idiosyncratic, contingent ways real relationships develop.”—ScienceModern media and culture have taught you a vast array of inaccurate ideas about dating and relationships. Scroll through Instagram and Tiktok, and you’ll inevitably see the influence of a buzzy new branch of science—evolutionary psychology—at play in videos, touting gender stereotypes and spreading a deeply flawed story about romance and connection. Evolutionary psychology claims that our minds have been shaped by primal drives that pit the genders against each other, from the myth that men are wired to be promiscuous to the notion that wealth, status, and beauty are the ultimate aphrodisiacs. In Bonded by Evolution UC Davis psychology professor Paul Eastwick reveals that these stories bear little resemblance to how pair-bonding really works. While beauty and charisma factor into first impressions, their influence fades fast—after a few months, we barely agree on who's “desirable.” Drawing on pathbreaking research—including original experiments from his own lab—Eastwick explains that lasting attraction has, from ancestral times through the present, been built through gradual, often mundane moments that forge strong attachment bonds. Ultimately, he offers a liberating new paradigm for finding meaningful, exciting relationships, showing us:Why the traits we often look for in a partner—personality, lifestyle, values, and humor—are poor predictors of compatibility, and what behaviors and experiences we should focus on insteadWhy someone's tendency to “date around” or their reputation as a player has little bearing on their long-term relationship potentialWhy the most secure relationships offer a "safe haven" and "secure base" for each partner, and how to cultivate them in new and existing relationshipsBy excavating the hidden history of human mating, Eastwick paints a radical new picture of the roots of enduring chemistry. Distilling evolutionary biology, anthropology, and psychology into accessible insights, Bonded by Evolution explains why we so often choose dating strategies that make us miserable and how to use a more evolved approach.

1. Paul , Eastwick

Bonded by Evolution

A ground-breaking look at the science of love and connection - and an urgent corrective to some of our most fundamental assumptions about attraction.'In a world saturated with cynical advice about dating and gender, this book is a revelation.' DANIEL H. PINK, author of Drive and The Power of Regret'One of the most joyfully uplifting antidotes to 21st-century gloom.' THE TIMES---------------------We're told that what men and women desire from relationship is different - he's looking for novelty, she's looking for commitment; he's concerned with looks, she's concerned with status.We're told that we live in a hierarchy of romantic inequality - where some are 10s and others are 2s; where some people are marriage material and others are wired for promiscuity.But this narrative is unscientific.Such ideas have their roots in a branch of science called evolutionary psychology, and over the past few decades its ideas have permeated our culture and fuelled a narrative that inspires despair and anxiety - and, in its most extreme form, these ideas have been hijacked in the service of misogyny and violence.But the truth about human attraction - and the way evolution plays out in our romantic lives - is much more interesting and optimistic.Bonded by Evolution offers a radical new picture of the roots of enduring chemistry. Distilling evolutionary biology, anthropology and psychology and informed by his pathbreaking research and original experiments at the Attraction and Relationships Research Laboratory in California, psychology professor Paul Eastwick reveals how attraction is best depicted as a process of finding - and, often, creating - a compatible relationship.Once we understand how ancestral humans sought compatible partners in small networks, we can build a clearer - and brighter - picture of how attraction, sex and relationships really work.---------------------More praise for Bonded by Evolution:'Profound and pragmatic, suggesting an entirely different approach to the study - and pursuit - of love.' ERIC KLINENBERG, co-author of Modern Romance'Rarely have scientific rigor and exuberant optimism been such congenial companions . . . Bonded by Evolution presents an optimistic new paradigm, one that provides clear guidance for romantic success.' ELI FINKEL, author of The All or Nothing Marriage

1. Paul Eastwick

Bonded by Evolution